That “aha” moment

There is a significant correlation between our kind and the use of pornographic material. Once upon a time, one might imagine that the size of a person’s porn stash might have been a rough and ready indicator of their reliance on porn and their potential for being one of our kind. Nowadays the…

via The Porn Supremacy — Knowing the Narcissist

HG Tudor has done a superb job at explaining the “why” of so many reasons my ex did what he did.   So a big Thank you to HG.   Makes me realize that perhaps all these therapists over the years haven’t been lying; I always was “good enough.”  Strange that I end up feeling validated by one of their kind, this, I need to explore with the shrink….

2 responses to “That “aha” moment

  1. Porn was a HUGE part of my relationship with my ex but I never really knew why. Reading the linked article it all made sense. Night after F’kng night I went to bed with him promising to be right there and morning after morning I woke up and cried because he hadn’t come to bed. I would find him asleep at the computer after spending all might watching Porn and going on POF. For a long time that was enough for him, he didn’t actually hook up with anyone. After years I stopped reacting to the Porn and personal ads because I told myself he never actually DID anything about it. When I stopped reacting that’s when he started actually meeting up with women. He fed off my pain.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve been out for 5 years but I’m still learning things, still piecing things together. I’m still trying to understand things like cognitive dissonance and traumatic bonding at the emotional level. I’ve long got them at a purely intellectual level. Sometimes I think it takes longer to internalize things. The damage is long lasting as it were…..


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