Monthly Archives: September 2018

I’m a bitch


I’m the bitch neighbor that swears at you through the condo walls all night, loud enough so that you can hear because you stir fry your nasty fish-heads and the smell permeates my living space causing me to want to retch.

For the love of everything holy, stop eating fish-heads you asshole!!! Switch it up for one fucking day and order pizza.

I’m the bitch Masshole driver at whom you beeped your horn because you falsely assumed I was going to cut out in traffic when you drove by.  WTF? Okay grandma!! How could you tell based on me idling there if I was going to pull out or sit there for 5 more minutes?  Just for you horning me, I decided to gun it and follow you for a mile just so I get behind you at the next red light and blast my horn about twenty times hoping to see how scared shit it makes you feel.  You know what they say about payback.

Yeah, I’m that same bitch who jumped out of my car at a different red light ‘cause some dude called me a bitch.  I hopped out of my car and walked over to his car and said, “you’re all tough from inside  your car,  whaddya gonna do now? Why don’t you get the fuck out of your car you fucking coward and call me a bitch to my face!”   He didn’t, he drove away without saying a word.

My dad yelled at me and was upset.  He  said the guy in that car could have shot me.  But the truth is, I didn’t give a fuck.  When you feel you’ve got nothin’ to lose, it changes the way you view the world.

There is so much rage coursing through my veins lately.  I don’t recognize my own reflection in the mirror.  I used to be such a sweet, giving, loving woman.   Now I’m just a bitch.

Strange how life can change you.  Long standing trauma, abuse, and pain can create deep seated anger and resentment which can ruin a person if they hold onto it.   Argh!! I don’t want be a bitch!

I gotta go now,  I’ll gotta take to the highway to scream obscenities at the people in cars that piss me off and then come home to spray febreeze outside my neighbors door.


Mwah ha ha ha ha


Kyrie Eleison

Lord , have Mercy 


Mwah ha ha ha



It’s true


She let herself go



Want to know how a woman goes from looking sexy and shaving her pussy, getting her brows waxed, nails done; to packing on a shit ton of weight, wearing a pair of sweatpants like skin, and wandering through life with no make-up?

Too easy.

Its because….she gave up.

“There are some things worse than being alone,” my step-dad once told me, “and one of them is being in a bad relationship.” ‘Course I didn’t believe him at that time.

I’ve got an update for him now, if he were here for me to tell.   But he’s gone the bastard.  My step-dad disowned me when my mom told him his son had molested me as a child.  The truth hurts, some run.

I’d tell him,  “There are some thing worse than being dead and one of them is staying in a relationship once it’s already on life-support instead of just pulling the plug.”

Watching yourself slip away a little at a time after your partner slipped away.   When you finally “come to”, you are old and ugly and barely recognizable in the mirror.   Worse still, your soul feels marred and there is a disconnect from the only Higher Power that can pull you from the black place you find yourself in.

You are now a mere shadow of who you once were.  Not caring if you are physically dead some days, because you already feel dead on the inside.  The urge to pull the wheel to the embankment at 80 mph on the freeway creeps in more than it should.

“She let herself go”, you hear them say, and you don’t even care anymore.  It’s true because you did.  So fucking what.

You have bigger fish to fry now, than a to maintain that trim waistline and to try and look sexy for any superficial jerk-off liar who objectifies women.

Newsflash bitches.  Your cocks aren’t a higher power.  They never were.   And for all the women ensnared by abusive asshole men who exploited our kindness and love? I’ll raise you a fuck off to your “ISO a submissive” racket.

Stop acting out your own victimization under the pretense of helping to guide, shape, or otherwise better women.

Oh she let herself go alright, and that may have been a blessing in disguise.   Because  now maybe she can go inward and create the person she should have been.







easy to lose one’s mind in this anger

bitterness seems to know no end

for years i wanted you but

you shunned me

now you’re health is waning

let’s get one thing straight

not going to be your nurse nanny

after you made me beg for your affection

for years

while you only gave me crumbs

fuck that.

but her

oh her

you never let me forget how she was better than me

you gave her the respect that I never got

talkin’ about how she was everything I wasn’t

do you think she’ll come up in here to wipe your ass?

oh that’s right she found comfort in another man’s wallet

all that’s left, are memories of dreams unrealized

all that’s left, in me is this resentment

all that’s left, is the realization that I stayed too long




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